There is SO much diversity out there – yet we all strive to be accepted. For some reason, so many of us refuse to appreciate ourselves for who we truly are and are always striving to be something else.
The persecution some people have faced over time because they were not seen as being “normal” is unimaginable but, generally speaking, the world is becoming increasingly more accepting and standards that would have been deemed unacceptable even 50 years ago are now common place. More than ever, people who are considered to be “different”, are standing up and demanding acceptance.
While this is – for the most part -a good thing, there are still a lot of inequalities and judgments circulating.
A particular group of people who are fighting against societal judgments, are people who are overweight. On social media, hashtags such as; #honourmycurves #plussize #thickchicks and #pizzasisters4lyfe are being used to create communities where people share pictures of their “unconventionally” beautiful bodies in an effort to support each other. These people have learned to embrace their bodies and un-apologetically enjoy flaunting what they’ve got.
Equally there are people on the other extreme who are promoting the stick-thin, malnourished look where followers will encourage each other to continue to loose weight and to never give in to temptations that will compromise their figures.
In addition to these, there is another category of “clean eaters” where people religiously stick to a healthy eating regime and will post perfectly edited pictures of their vibrantly coloured meals online. Unfortunately, this can often lead to cases of Orthorexia – which is a relatively new eating disorder where people are obsessed with being healthy. (It is my belief that acquiring this disorder is heavily linked with exposure to these online accounts and other healthy eating jargon and advertising within society).
But what if you do not fit into a category? What if you are too fat to be skinny, but too skinny to be fat? What if you are not comfortable with either flaunting yourself or starving yourself?
Does that mean you are not welcome? You have no place?
The funny thing is, these groups and communities were formed to make those who feel ‘different’ in some way, accepted, and to make them feel like what they are defending is worthwhile. Yet does that mean that if you do not share the same beliefs or have the same circumstances as the people in those groups, you are not accepted either?
The irony of creating support groups is that there will always be more people who become excluded as a result!
In reality, it means that unless you proudly flaunt your belly rolls or alternatively, exhibit your hip bones and post pictures of your perfectly arranged meals, (in this example), you will not have a network of supporters and you will not get 1000+ likes for every picture you post.
There’s something very sad about that.
I am not clinically fat. Neither am I skinny. I am, for all intents and purposes, “normal”, yet I still feel like an outsider because I am not confident enough to flaunt my flaws.
It would be nice if there was a “I look normal” hashtag, but then again, what even is normal? … And by creating that kind of community I would only be condoning other exclusive accounts and promoting further isolation – which defeats my point entirely!
Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying that all support groups are bad, in fact I have stumbled across some really positive accounts, but I just feel that in the process of trying to be inclusive, a lot of these accounts are becoming, maybe even unintentionally, exclusive.
An ideal situation would be one in which no one has to use hashtags or comments to defend themselves because there would be no judgments or stigmas to result in the need for them anyway! Everybody would be accepting of each other and no one would be made to feel inadequate or unwelcomed.
This is unfortunately a very unrealistic situation and one that we will probably never get to see but it is important to remember that we are more powerful than we think we are. Change begins with YOU and you never know how far a little kindness can go. So be a little kinder, be a little more accepting and …
And STOP judging!
The Honest Life 